I’ll begin with this quotation of Emilio Zapata Salazar, and my source (no, I’m not making this up) is the Hollywood laugher Ocean’s Thirteen: “I’d rather die on my feet than live on my knees.”

Let’s start with a simple, personal premise: I Voter, CBK, not of New York, but through my writing over the years and through the local and national political figures I’ve supported, the beliefs I hold dear, and the manner in which I choose to live my life, am a Conservative. A quick review of my thinking would have some branding me a cynic, but at the core I’ve always been an idealist, practically a romantic idealist at that. Absolutist in nature, I’d be a terrible politician, which is why it’s more fun to observe and react to America’s favorite game, one that becomes less-trivial by the day.

The philosophy that I most closely identify with is Ayn Rand’s unified philosophical system, Objectivism, primarily because of its belief in the right of the Individual to exist as he believes fit; its belief that Capitalism is the closest thing to a Utopian (poor word, but anyway) political system; its mistrust and outright disdain of collective bargaining; and its rejection of superstition and mysticism as a relevant force to hold power over the Individual.

Lotta fancy words there, but the point is I believe what most Conservatives believe – I want the government to leave me alone most of the time. I appreciate the roads, the bridges and the bombers, but I don’t want to be taxed to the gills, nor do I want people who have more money than me taxed through the gills either. Some of those people supply my income stream is a simple way to put it. Furthermore, I want to be left alone – to believe what I want to believe, to consume what I can afford, to live where I am able, and most importantly, to not be told “no.” Better yet – I want every other American to be able to do all these things as well.  

Ergo, I’m a Conservative. Some might think it childish, but I think it the opposite: I have the strange belief that America, as conceived, is the greatest force for good and the greatest reliever of human misery and suffering in all of history. I don’t think this needs to be tinkered with, though it has been, endlessly at that.

For years, now, I’ve capitalized the “C” in Conservative because, even though it’s Conservative is not a national party, it is a much clearer descriptor for what me and 40 percent of Americans are. Some Americans are libertarian in nature, believers in lower-to-almost no taxes, a small-but-effective national defense, dove-ish foreign policy and a strict, literalist interpretation of the Constitution. Other Conservatives – the ones the blue-blood GOPers on the East Coast despise – are Moral Majority conservatives. They believe in God, Country, Life, Patriotism, Defense and American exceptionalism. Because ‘corny’ notions such as ‘God’ and ‘Country’ play such a strong role in the way they live their lives, they are endlessly mocked by ‘coasters of all types, liberal and conservative. When one mixes libertarians and moralists, one tends to get a groovy java of empathetic, small-tax defense hawks, many of whom choose to live life well off the beaten path, many others who have large families, almost all of whom who support the Second Amendment above all others, wisely knowing that without the Second, the others are not enforceable by the vox populi.

I’m not a registered Republican, nor have I ever been. I vote for the GOPer most of the time, but in the Great State of Oklahoma, doesn’t really matter – we routinely elect the most Conservative politicians in the country because we are a state of God, Guns and Get Off My Property. We are the reddest state by default, and our Donkeys are more Conservative than many GOPers (just ask Dan Boren, our lone national Donkey Representative right now, and the troublesome spot he finds himself in).

With the premise that I am a Conservative established, I agree with other brands of Conservatives on most things and respectfully disagree with them on a few others, we get to the question: Are Conservatives ready to go all in, defy the GOP and potentially give Donkeys a grip of power so strong and chilling we will never recover?

This Conservative is. To re-quote the passage from the silly film, I’d rather die on my feet than live on my knees. This isn’t a matter of life and death per se, but it is about to be a test of what Conservatives are willing to lose in contrast to what we could gain. Bluntly, I’d rather be stabbed in the heart by a Donkey than stabbed in the back by a GOPer.

Et tu, Newt?

Ground Zero for this fight is taking place in the farthest reach of New York State’s District 23, where there existed a teapot and into which a tempest of the highest order was introduced. The former Congressman of the District, John J. McHugh, left his office to become The Secretary of the Army, so a special election is about to be held on Nov. 3, an election so special that an icon of the Right, Newt Gingrich, is now being lambasted while a woman presumed (no, not presumed, “fancifully wished”) to be a political pariah sent an endorsement through Facebook to the Conservative Party Candidate, who is now trying to build on a tidal wave of national Conservative support and do the unthinkable: split the GOP vote and, at the same time, defeat a unified Donkey front.

Gov. Palin, who herself is turning into a de facto kingmaker for Conservatives, seems to understand with organic fluidity what very, very smart politicians like Newt Gingrich do not: the era of the RINO has come and gone, and the Era of Choosing Sides has begun.

So, Conservatives are struggling with a question: do we go all in for Doug Hoffman, a successful accountant who’s never run for public office at risk of splitting the GOP vote and thus giving a free ride to the Democrat (and Working Families Party) nominee Bill Owens, to Capitol Hill? Although the question has already been answered by funds, endorsements, etc for Conservatives, do we do the pragmatic thing and support the GOPer candidate Deidre Scozzafava, a woman who has been endorsed by NARAL, Planned Parenthood, and the Working Families Party (parent-company: ACORN) repeatedly, but is – in fairness – the woman picked by GOPer leaders in NY23?

The answer in NY23 is now easy, and getting easier by the day. Sarah Palin broke the dam with her endorsement (and in deference to Fred Thompson, who I supported in the GOPer primaries of ’08, he was there first), and now the endorsements from other politicians Conservative and skeptical alike are pouring in. I don’t buy the polling that Hoffman has taken the lead – yet – but what is obvious is that Conservatives, bastard step-child of the GOP for years, have had enough. We were mocked for the Tea Parties, we were mocked for the Town Halls, and let’s not even start on the mockery Sarah Palin has endured over the last 13 months.

In short, we’ve reached a point where the adults are about to attempt to regain control of the dinner table.

The reticence owes to Ross Perot, of course, the modern-ancestor to the Tea Parties, the Town Halls and Sarah Palin. We remember that it was Perot, the quirky billionaire with his charts and graphs who gave Bill Clinton the golden ticket to the White House. With the legacy of Perot standing like an elephant with magic powers in the room of the GOPer-Conservative paradigm, there is plenty of skepticism to be endured.

This particular Conservative seeks the pragmatic approach – support GOPers when they reflect Conservative ideals, but ditch GOPers when they begin talking of ‘reaching out to the center.’ The Center, to be clear, is for people who have no idea what they think, and will sell their vote to whichever bandwagon has the strongest, tastiest beer. Last year, then-Sen. Obama’s beer tasted better, apparently.

So, the fight is on. Do we risk the rot of the nation at the expense of political philosophy and idealism? Risk it? I say we gave it away a long time ago. We received the curse we deserved, and Pres. Obama and his band of merry pranksters hold power precisely because of weak-spined GOPers trying to appeal to voters who cast their lot, for better or worse, on the prettiest political presentation.

I’m willing to go down with the ship, if that’s where it’s headed. The fear is that Conservatives will do nothing more than ensure Donkey prowess ad infinitum by splitting votes, but I don’t really care. The House and Senate, to say nothing of GOPer leadership, are full of across-the-aislers who, in order to get a sliver of power, have sold the base – Conservatives – down the river. I’d just as soon see 535 Donkeys on the Hill as have a gaggle of slobbering Judas’s swayed by White House invites and Redskin box-seats represent the cause.

Note to GOP: put up the most viably Conservative candidate and flourish, or reach out to the middle and perish. I’m among millions who will not vote for whichever pro-choice, pro-union, pro-tax, anti-gun, anti-defense placeholder you can find. This voter’s days of straight party voting is over. If people like Scazzofava is the best that the GOP can do, I’ll simply recuse.